Friendship is like peeing on yourself, everyone can see it but only you will feel the warmth of it.
Love, NanaBanana
Trials and Tribulations of a Banana's Life
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Monday, September 7, 2009
So the story goes
SO.. as you all are aware.. I have never dated anyone ever...
I am prompted to pen down my thoughts on this issue because my friend has broken up with her boyfriend of 4 years and she is having a hard time with it.
I dont date because I am a wimp.. I am a coward. I am afraid to put my heart out in the open.. only to get it eventually stomped on. I don't think I am strong enough to move on.. Sure, life goes on and memories fade and new memories are formed.. but it will always be there.. That awkwardness.. that longing.. that intimacy.. How can you move on from something you thought was going to work out?
I see the pain she goes through and I feel it. She took all their pictures down and she just breaks down and cry. What can I say? What can I do? I can't take the pain away.. No one can.. except her.. or him.. and I don't see that happening any time soon. How do you remove something that has been incorporated into your life over such a long period of time? How can you make the pain go away?
How do you move on?
You can't-not without the pain.. and the sorrow.. and the perils.. and the empty longing for the same person who caused you so much misery.
Who's to say I will never get a boyfriend? Who knows. it might happen tomorrow.. Next month.. next year? or even 20 years from now? all i know is.. I dont wanna be vulnerable.. I dont want to feel the pain and heartache.. I dont wanna hurt..
More importantly.. I don't think I can handle being hurt..
I got one of those annoying mass forwarded emails the other day.. but this phrase caught my eye..
So with my friend.. All i can do is be there for her. I can't make the pain go away.. all I can do is help her.. distract her.. be with her.. be strong with her. and just show her a way.. maybe MY way..
I am prompted to pen down my thoughts on this issue because my friend has broken up with her boyfriend of 4 years and she is having a hard time with it.
I dont date because I am a wimp.. I am a coward. I am afraid to put my heart out in the open.. only to get it eventually stomped on. I don't think I am strong enough to move on.. Sure, life goes on and memories fade and new memories are formed.. but it will always be there.. That awkwardness.. that longing.. that intimacy.. How can you move on from something you thought was going to work out?
I see the pain she goes through and I feel it. She took all their pictures down and she just breaks down and cry. What can I say? What can I do? I can't take the pain away.. No one can.. except her.. or him.. and I don't see that happening any time soon. How do you remove something that has been incorporated into your life over such a long period of time? How can you make the pain go away?
How do you move on?
You can't-not without the pain.. and the sorrow.. and the perils.. and the empty longing for the same person who caused you so much misery.
Who's to say I will never get a boyfriend? Who knows. it might happen tomorrow.. Next month.. next year? or even 20 years from now? all i know is.. I dont wanna be vulnerable.. I dont want to feel the pain and heartache.. I dont wanna hurt..
More importantly.. I don't think I can handle being hurt..
I got one of those annoying mass forwarded emails the other day.. but this phrase caught my eye..
"No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry"
Rhetoric ain't it?
Maybe one day, I will find a guy who is worth the tears I will shed.. but till that day.. I am happy in my cocoon of singledom.. Yes, I guess it is nice to have someone there for you irregardless.. but as of right now.. i will have my family and friends. and if they don't suffice.. I dont know what else can..
So with my friend.. All i can do is be there for her. I can't make the pain go away.. all I can do is help her.. distract her.. be with her.. be strong with her. and just show her a way.. maybe MY way..
NanaBanana
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)